Here are some helpful ways to quickly identify a jerk. These are some of the more common situations, but is by no means a complete list:

  • JerkHe treats his friends and family poorly, does not value others in his life.
  • He will never come to your place or he will never let you come to his
  • You are suddenly having many strong negative emotions that are out of your character (jealous, insecurity) now that this guy is in your life
  • You question yourself regularly when around him, you question your core values, he’s gotten you to do things you are not comfortable with
  • He yells at you, is abusive verbally, physically or sexually
  • He’s completely different in private as he is in public, puts on a “mask” in public, has a “script” with people to charm them.
  • He’s inconsistent: sometimes sweet, sometimes absent or cold
  • He doesn’t respect your time and cancels plans regularly
  • He dismisses your interests and activities
  • He only compliments you on your looks and sexual attributes to objectify you
  • He lies
  • He tries to play people against each other, for example try to get women to be jealous or compete for his attention
  • He’s cruel to animals
  • He belittles your feelings when you share them, calls you “crazy”.
  • He goes out of his way to help strangers, but ignores the needs of people who are suppose to be close in his life.
  • He borrows money from you.